[	mood	|	weird	]
[	music	|	Saint Etienne - We're in the City	]

...this probably won't change your mind. I, being the insane person I am, find it incredibly entertaining.
I took my clown loaches back to the pet shop today because my midas hates them and has been forcing them to live under a rock (literally) for quite some time. After realising that the loaches were gone, my midas apparently decided he needed someone else to pick on and chose my oscar as his target. The oscar is two times his size, but not nearly as aggressive, and herein lies the problem. My oscar is my favourite, so I'll probably end up taking the midas back to the pet shop, as bad as I hate to. I just can't stand by and let the midas beat him up.
Anywho, at first the oscar was swimming away, scared shitless because he wasn't expecting his tankmate, who he had been getting along just fine with for months, to attack him. I put the midas in a breeding net for about an hour, during which time the oscar gathered his courage and was flaring at the midas through the net, so I decided to let the midas out and give it one more chance. The midas got what was coming to him this time... a big bite to the face.

After this, the midas would hide in his cave under the loach rock. Every time he came out, he was flaring and acting like king of the tank, ready to challenge the oscar again... but then the oscar would give him "the look," and he'd immediately pin his fins to his body and rush back under his rock like a whipped puppy! He'd also dart out on occasion, make a quick lap around one of the plants, and dash back under the rock like "Haha! I was out and you couldn't catch me!!" Whenever he was out from under the rock and I came near the tank, instead of swimming up to the glass like he usually does, he would go hide in fear that I was going to put him back in the breeding net.

Coincidentally, that's where he is right now. The oscar just isn't aggressive enough to stick up for himself, and that's why I think I'm going to be forced to take the midas back. This really sucks, as I like them both a whole lot, but I can't afford to keep them in two separate tanks because they both need at least 55 gallons to live happily.

I'm thinking I'll return him and get another oscar instead. I knew it was a gamble when I put the midas with the oscar and that it might not last forever (midas are notoriously aggressive,) but I'm sure two oscars will get along fine. Last time I was there, a pet shop in Tyler had some REALLY pretty black-and-silver oscars, as well as some pure white ones... they were fairly large at the time too, so that's my best bet for a new tankmate for Aristotle.
Poor Antoine the midas. You will be missed... I hope someone retarded doesn't buy you and kill you.

In other news, I have a statistics test tomorrow. YAY!

[	mood	|	blah	]
[	music	|	Romeo + Juliet - Kissing You (Instrumental)	]

I had to go to the dentist again today. My tooth has been kinda sensitive when I bite down on it the past couple of days (yes, the same damn tooth the filling came out of.) Also, it is even more sentitive to cold now thanks to the type of filling they replaced the old one with. Anyway, he said that when I bite, I am putting the vast majority of the pressure on that tooth (I blame braces for fucking that up,) and he ground the top of it off a little to even things out. It helped a lot, but it still feels kinda funny when I'm eating, so I might have to go back yet again. At least there was no charge for what he did today. Damnit, why can't my mouth just be normal? I hate you, mouth.

Edit: Yes, I'm definitely going to have to go back. It doesn't hurt when I clench my teeth, but chewing food on the right side of my mouth is still uncomfortable... and getting anything the slightest bit cold near that tooth is downright painful. They'll probably have to drill out that filling and replace it with a different kind. Sigh.

[	mood	|	satisfied	]
[	music	|	Scissor Sisters - The Skins	]

zhahira: You're just like, a magic wand that turns people gay.

Come on ladies, you know you want me.

[	mood	|	hyper	]
[	music	|	Nena - 99 Red Ballons (German)	]

Yes, guppies are much like teenage boys, and I bought a new fish tank.
I went to the pet shop to ask if they had any larger frozen shrimp that I could feed my oscar, since he has been eating bloodworms and they're small so he tends to make a mess... and it was SUPER crowded today. Three separate families with kids, plus a group of stupid ladies buying a hermit crab and asking 3248108401 questions about that damn crab. I decided to just hang out in a corner with the fish until the place cleared out enough for me to be able to look around or move. Well, I ended up by the feeder guppy tank, where I spotted two fish that were certainly not guppies, but very cool looking. I asked about them as soon as I got a chance, and was told they were pencil fish.... which I had seen pictures of online earlier, and wanted to buy the second I saw them. I decided to get them, and while watching them for several minutes while waiting until one of the employees had time to help me, my childhood fascination with feeder guppies resurfaced. They're so tiny it's like they have their own little microworld. That's when I decided I wanted to make a microtank.
Long story short, I bought the pencil fish, five guppies, and a new 5 gallon tank for them to live in. Some of the live ghost shrimp I originally bought to feed my oscar escaped their horrible fate in order to be tankmates for the guppies, and as a bonus, I found two guppy fry in the bag with my shrimp. The tank isn't all that colourful, needless to say, but the fish are very lively and interesting to watch... the pencil fish were originally going in my 10 gallon, but they look like they have plenty of room in the 5 gallon, since they're so small. The male guppies have been chasing the females (and one-another) around all day, gonopodiums (think peens) waving. I might get an African dwarf frog or a crab to go with them later.

Also, I completely forgot to ask about the frozen shrimp.

[	mood	|	frustrated	]
[	music	|	Sonique - Feels So Good	]

I'm either slowly switching from right brained to left brained, or I'm just balancing out their use... isn't that cool? I'm so much more analytical that I used to be, and it's kinda a neat transition to watch.

Anyway... Some random guy on Yahoo messaged me today pussyfooting around the question of whether or not I'd want to have a threesome with him and his girlfriend. I wish he would just ask outright, because it wastes time to pussyfoot around something like that. Asking my sexuality beforehand isn't going to make me warm up to the idea, you know, especially when I've never met or spoken to you in my life. Later, he said he was trying to compliment me and I was being rude about it.
This is what brings me to my point. I fucking hate shallow compliments. I hate being told I'm pretty, attractive in the physical sense of the word only, or cute. I don't care whether or not I am any of these things. I don't consider that a genuine compliment. Tell me I'm smart, witty, or interesting, damnit! Don't give me any of this "pretty" bullshit! Any fish in the sea can be pretty... it doesn't mean anything!
When you don't know a person and are only attracted to them for looks, though, I suppose that's the only thing you can really say about them... which is really sad. People disgust me. Sure, it's only human to be attracted to certain people for looks alone, but don't pretend you actually care if that's all you're in it for. Just ask if they want to sexx0r you and get it over with, for Christ's sake. It'll save you both a lot of time.

[	mood	|	okay	]
[	music	|	Varekai Soundtrack - Kero Hireyo	]

This is my rant about how not to be a stupid whore. Stupid whores are things that annoy me, and we all know that's bad.

I was tired today. Very, very tired and sleepy. All I wanted to do was go home and take a nap, but I was also hungry and had a few errands to run. I decided I'd pick up my lunch at Chicken Express before running the aforementioned errands, because Chicken Express is close to the college and their drive-thru is usually very fast. There were a couple of cars in front of me today, though, so I was treated to a 10 minute wait... which I didn't really mind, since I was only half-conscious anyway. What I did mind was the person in the car in front of me. She spent the entirety of those 10 minutes applying the same two items of makeup over and over again, presumably in the persuit of perfection. She was still applying her makeup when she pulled up to the window to get her chicken, and I think I saw her still holding the mascara as she pulled out onto the road. There's something about this type of person that grinds my nerves, even if they're several yards away in an entirely different car. I hate the mere sight of them. I hated watching her staring at her own makeup-caked face. I hated watching her apply that mascara 50 times. I hated watching her apply liquid base with her grubby hands and then wipe the excess off on the headrest of her passenger seat. That's fucking disgusting. That headrest may have begun life as an olive green fabric, but I guarantee you that it is now nothing but skin-tone pigment. It's one thing to put your makeup on in the car, but it's quite another to take 10 minutes to put on the same two items which you are already wearing 301483941 layers of. A side effect of this obsessive makeup application is that she was paying absolutely zero attention to anything else, meaning the car in front of her in line was usually two car-lengths ahead before she thought, "Oh yeah, maybe I should pull up!"
When she got to the ordering thingy-ma-doo, she was apparently incapable of reading the menu for herself. She gaped at it for a few minutes with her mouth wide open before asking, "Do you have chicken strips?"
It's Chicken fucking Express. No, of course they don't have chicken strips.
Her second question was "Do you have packages of...... like....... a certain number of strips with side orders?"
First thing listed on the menu: "Four/seven express tender meal -- comes with two side orders"
The poor employee had to verbally list for this brainless baby-maker all items on the menu which involved chicken strips and side orders, until the makeup-caked meat sack finally decided on the 7 strip meal with two side orders and a gallon of tea.
Instead of pulling up to the window, she decided to examine herself in the mirror again until I honked at her out of frustration. While at the window, she admired herself in her rear-view mirror until prompted for payment for her meal. After that, she was finally out of my line of sight, thank God.
I haven't been treated to a display of that level of narcissism in a long time.

Now, onto a completely different subject. I was telling mom about how Kat has to get her wisdom teeth out during spring break, and I had always been under the impression that mom's wisdom teeth didn't grow in until her late twenties, because she told me they had grown in late... turns out, I misunderstood. They actually didn't come in until her early thirties, and then only because she was pregnant with me and the hormonal changes prompted it. She only ever got two wisdom teeth, and those grew in all crazy, malformed, and sideways. I never want to have children in the first place, so hey, if I'm lucky, I'll never have wisdom teeth! They haven't shown any sign of coming in, but it's early yet.

Now, as promised, pics of the mask I get from the Varekai gift shop:







And I finally got my ministry certificate from the Universal Life Church. They also sent me the ministry certificate and official swami certificate of someone named Jeffery Cox. That came in a separate envelope, but was addressed to me. Hopefully Jeffery gets that sorted out.

[	mood	|	relaxed	]
[	music	|	Travis - The Beautiful Occupation	]

Happy Singles Awareness Day! Well ok, I'm writing this at 12:01, so I'm technically a day late. Deal with it.

Yesterday mom, dad, and I went to see Cirque du Soleil's Varekai in Houston. It was awesome, as Cirque always is, but not as good as Alegria... or Zumanity. Nothing can compare to Zumanity. Then again, Zumanity is the only show Cirque has where the acts can be openly sexual in nature, which is probably why I liked it so much. Varekai had one act where these two guys in identical costumes got dangerously close while doing aerial acrobatics. They were supposed to represent Castor and Pollux, but their brotherly love seemed awfully suggestive to me; due in large part to the fact that they were two strong, amazing bodies embracing while scantily clad, I'm sure. Their act was fantastically beautiful, might I add. That and the Georgian dance were my favourite acts of the show.
I got a shirt, a very cool poster, and the Varekai CD from the giftshop... Oh, and a hand-made mask!!! It's gorgeous. I've been wanting one ever since we saw Alegria and I set eyes on those things. Pictures will come, I assure you. I'm going to buy a display case for it. It makes me wish I had a masquerade to wear it to, hehe. I wanted one of the awesome feather boas they sell too, but one extremely expensive item was quite enough, thank you. Maybe I'll save up my money so I can get one of the $100+ boas next time.

Today I got new brakes for my car, so mom drove me from the car repair shop to SFA and picked me up at lunch time. It was nice not having to walk all over the place and ride the shuttle bus. I also got to show mom what my crazy hippy Statistics professor looks like, since he happened to be walking across the parking lot when we arrived. My Psychology and Evolution professors gave us candy for Valentine's day. Sadly, my Evolution professor also gave us a test... he said the candy was to prove he doesn't really hate us. My Psych professor told us to all wish our neighbors a happy Valentine's day. When everyone laughed, he said "You laugh, but you don't know if that person won't even get a hug today!!" This was followed by telling us all to stand up and give at least two people sitting near us a hug. Everyone in my Psych class definitely got at least one hug today, including the professor *lol*

Kat introduced me to a pretty awesome band called Sister Scissors. I like them so much that I actually went to Hastings looking for a CD of theirs that I knew Hastings wasn't going to have. Instead, I bought 12 Memories by Travis, and SunnyPsyOp from OhGr. Hey, I haven't bought any CDs in a long, long time -- so I figured I'd treat myself and buy two. Both of them are excellent in very different ways. OhGr is hyperactive and thoroughly insane. They make music with sounds that one wouldn't expect could be made into music. OhGr fills the void left by Orgy, which was my favourite band back in the day (as anyone who knows me should be well aware of. Their posters still decorate my room.) I wouldn't say that they necessarily sound alike, but they are sufficiently similar to the point that I get the same emotional vibe from OhGr that I get from Orgy's first CD. Orgy made two pretty good CDs, but now they're trying to be punk, and that's sad. They used to have this rather unique electronic-ish sound... which is what OhGr has to an extreme. I didn't bother to buy Orgy's new CD. OhGr also has the lead singer of Skinny Puppy (who I think sounds a bit like the lead singer from Orgy,) incase you're wondering.
Travis, on the other hand, is calm and deep. They're what I listen to when I want to relax and be uplifted. They remind me of a very much more optimistic-sounding version of Ours. Both bands have music which carries emotion amazingly well. I can't listen to either of them without taking on the mood of the songs. The major difference is that Ours is emotionally, and almost physically, tiring to listen to. I get so wrapped up in their music that I become part of it and it exhausts me after a while (not that that's bad, mind you, but you have to be in the mood for it.) Travis is much "easier" to listen to. Like I said, they're relaxing and uplifting; I think because the songs aren't as intense. They convey emotion by just letting it flow out, whereas Ours shouts with every ounce of their soul until they simply have no more breath. I mean that metaphorically, but actually, that's what the vocalist sometimes does.

After Hastings, I went to Walmart to buy my parents some Valentine's Day goodies. I can't just be normal, as you well know, so I bought mom some Valentine's cacti instead of flowers. The cactus gardens that came in decorative pots didn't have very pretty plants in them, so I bought three cacti I liked, and decided to plant them in a pretty pot for mom myself. By the time I bought the plants, a pot, chocolates, pretty pebbles to put with the cacti to cover the potting soil, etc, I had spent $70. Ouch. It was worth it though, because mom really really liked it. I prefer to give living plants rather than flowers, because they last longer... besides, everybody gets flowers.

Once again, I forgot to study for my Botany Lab test tomorrow. Last time I just studied during Botany and still only missed one question, so I'm not going to sweat it. Botany Lab is definitely easier than Zoology Lab was. The questions on the quizzes aren't tricky! ... well, except for the one I missed. It was "what substance glues cells together?" I answered pectin, because that really is the cell glue stuff, but the answer was supposed to have been middle lamella... which is the pectin-rich area between cells. So sue me for being more specific than I needed to be. I've been in Zoology Lab, damnit; I thought we were supposed to be specific! Oh well. C'est la vie.

C'est la vie.

[	mood	|	faggy	]
[	music	|	Ya-Ya Sisters Soundtrack - Walk In Jerusalem	]

I felt the need to link to PETA because, fairly recently, The-Spot.net abolished my false belief that everyone knew what PETA is. If it can be assumed that posters from The-Spot are a fairly good representation of the population at large (and no, that's not true at all, but play along -- this is hypothetical,) then my relatively frequent use of PETA jokes is completely wasted on the majority of people. Sigh.

I rented Deer Hunter for PS2. I have been wanting to play a hunting game lately, for some reason. I've already beaten it. It's a shame that playing it makes me feel like a complete hick, thanks to the hunter randomly saying things like "Cain't let 'em get away!!!" or "That'd have been a perfect shawt!!"
Now, hunting simulation is cool and all, but it's nothing new. I don't think there's any sport in shooting Bambi from the safety of your comfy tree stand, especially when you've used cover scent and craftily lured him in with store-bought doe scent, a yummy meal of corn, and calls. I've been playing Deer Hunter using the bow weapon because it's slightly more difficult, but even that's not doing it for me.
I began to think of alterations that would make the game more interesting... it would be cool, for example, if you could choose to hunt only with a knife. Better still, it would be neat if you actually stood the chance of being gored by a pair of antlers or brutally mauled by a bear. Would someone actually buy a hunting game like that? Probably not. Why? Because it doesn't make any sense. People (and I'm making a generalisation here, because I'm sure there are a couple of wackos out there,) don't actually hunt with knives, and like to stay a safe distance from their prey, if I may be so bold as to use that term.
A hunting game I'd like to see is one where you play as a predator. A real predator. I'll use tigers as an example, though any number of animals could be used. Imagine a game where your goals include hunting to stay alive rather than to claim the biggest trophy. Hunting for predators isn't without risk, either. A tiger could easily get kicked by a potential meal and be rendered lame, or even killed. Other elements could be added, such as poachers and traps one must avoid in order to stay alive. Maybe the root goal of the game could be to survive long enough to find a mate and reproduce? Man, I would love to play a game like that.

[	mood	|	dorky	]
[	music	|	Right Said Fred - You're My Mate	]

My post count has been stuck on 111 for months now. I wonder how many posts I actually have? 111 is an attractive number, though. If my post count had to get stuck, I'm glad it stuck on a number I don't mind looking at every time I update.

I love The Guardian Unlimited. I really, really do. I don't read the vast majority of it though; oh no, I prefer to read the letters sent in to the Guardian Review. I'd subscribe to it if I weren't cheap and were willing to pay $125 a year for something I can get free online. The letters are short, sweet, and to the point, but most importantly, they make you think. They're submitted by different minds (some great, some not so great,) from all around the UK. Here's something lovely from the January 29th edition:

"James Wood chides Richard Dawkins for confusing scientific explanation with metaphysical interrogation in relation to the Asian tsunami. Surely Dawkins is refusing the legitimacy of the metaphysical question when it comes to such natural events? In raising the question - why do we suffer so? - Wood implicitly assumes that the tsunami was a deliberate act directed at human beings, that it was in some way a judgment or a punishment. By offering a scientific explanation Dawkins shows that natural events, such as tidal waves, are disinterested when it comes to the affairs of human beings. It is only our arrogance as a species that assumes there is some form of intent lurking behind the movement of tectonic plates."
Russell Davies
London

Isn't that just fantastic? This is one of the reasons science interests me so. It has revealed that the workings of nature, in contrast to beliefs of the past, have absolutely no regard for the affairs of man. We're just another unimportant "thing" in the way. Nature doesn't care if man happens to be living on the bit of land it completely obliterates with some natural disaster; nature doesn't punish or reward; nature isn't fair or unfair. Nature just is. If one were to broaden the scope and apply that mode of thinking to the world at large, it would ring just as true. To some, it may appear that the probability for life coming about as the result of a series of coincidental happenings is so miniscule that there must be some creative force behind it all... but the mere fact that life does indeed exist eliminates probability altogether. The probability of giving birth to conjoined twins is incredibly small -- until it happens. Then the probability magically leaps to 100%. Perhaps I'm wrong and there is some grand creative force behind it all, but if the workings of this world are any indication of the workings of the rest of the universe, I'd feel more comfortable placing my bet on that miniscule probability of random chance.

EDIT: Ok, haha, as much as I hate editing blog posts, this was just too great not to mention. From the September 25, 2004 issue:

"[...]

Far more serious, though, is the distortion of logic used by all neo-Darwinists in their decision that genes must be the sole determinants of inheritable characteristics merely because they cannot detect anything else."
Hugh Dower
York

I'll stop thinking that this comment is absolutely hilarious as soon as they find evidence that genes are not the sole determinants of inheritable characteristics. That's how science works... one pretty much has to assume that a certain theory is true in order to work from it. To my knowledge, there hasn't been any evidence to suggest that inheritable traits are anything other than genetic, so scientists have stuck to working with genes. The moment there's a hole found in the whole "trait inheritability determined by genes" thing, I'm sure another theory will come along to explain things; and that theory may very well include some other mechanism of heredity. The thing is, though, that you can't expect science to get ahead of itself like that. You have to research and exhaust all possibilities with current well-accepted theories before it becomes necessary to develop a new one. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

[	mood	|	busy	]
[	music	|	Elton John - Are You Ready For Love	]

Yes, I am listening to Elton John. I don't see how my being a huge, flaming wad of ghey is any of your business.

I am studying for my statistics test that may or may not be Friday. We were doing review today, so I figure a test might be coming up... it would really have helped if my professor had told us the test dates (or if I hadn't been absent when he told them... whichever.)
Statistics makes me feel pretty dumb sometimes, even though my professor said "if you don't understand statistics, you're in good company."
It's mostly because of how they word things... "The Fundamental Principles of Counting" sounds simple, right? I mean, come on, everyone can count! It's not that simple at all, though. Lies, all lies.

[	mood	|	discontent	]
[	music	|	Apocalyptica - Nothing Else Matters	]

I haven't drawn in so long that I'm not sure if I still can. I feel like all my pictures are gone, and that's really, really scary. Every time I sit down to draw, nothing comes. I don't want to lose my art, but it seems like the only thing I'm producing lately is worthless crap. I'm going to buy some canvas tomorrow and break out the Bombay ink in order to make a concentrated effort to produce something of worth... or I might just take a nap. Whatever.

I'm tired of everything, by the way. I'm tired of idiots, I'm tired of religion, I'm tired of worrying about wording my opinions correctly so that they don't come back to brutalise me with a baseball bat later, I'm tired of people disagreeing with me, and I'm tired of them agreeing with me, too. I'm becoming one of those old women who gets to say whatever the Hell she wants because she's old and no one's going to do anything about it... only I'm not old. That's the problem. I'm young, and people would probably beat me up if they weren't afraid of breaking me beyond repair. At least I've got that going for me, I guess.
Oh, and I'm tired of having this God damned split in my lip. My lips got really dry at my grandmother's house a couple of weeks ago (because her heater does that to you, no matter how much lipgloss you wear,) and they cracked in one corner. Now, every time that split tries to heal, I have to open my mouth wide to like... eat, and stuff... and it re-opens the split. Two weeks is way too long for this to be going on. It hurts to yawn.
So uh... like I was saying before the tangent... I guess about the only thing that hasn't been annoying me lately is science. Yeah. And Circe, of course, because my cat can do no wrong. And my friends, because I don't even see them enough anymore for them to be annoying, hah. I mostly just go to class, come home and take a nap because I don't get enough sleep during the night, wake up at 6 or 7:00PM and stay up really late at night because of the aforementioned nap. It's a vicious cycle.

I want to shave my head. From the neck up.
Just kidding... about the neck up part. I really do want to shave my head, though. I'm sick of my hair. It's always getting stuck under my backpack or purse strap, it gets tangled, it enjoys flying in my face on windy days so I can't see where the fuck I'm going (actually, it does that on non-windy days, too,) and I have to wash it every day because otherwise it looks and feels crappy. It's more trouble than it's worth, basically. I want to shave the whole mess off and leave nothing but peach fuzz. I'm determined to do so once it gets a little warmer so my brains don't freeze, and after I force myself to lift weights for a few months so that I don't look like a cancer patient. People will probably assume I'm a recovering cancer patient anyway, since women just aren't bald. I imagine shaving my head will make my mother (and possibly my father) cry, but I want to know what it feels like, damnit. I probably wouldn't leave it like that forever... but I would probably be tempted to keep it fairly short, at least. I always said I was going to grow my hair out long and then cut it dramatically short, and I'm just sticking to my word.

As a side note, I am not extremely upset about anything. For some reason, when I bitch on my Blog, certain people have a royal freakout and ask if I'm okay etc etc... so I'm just stating for the record that I am fine; just a little peeved and/or off balance. Don't worry, I don't plan to leap from a tall cliff anytime soon just because my lip is split.

[	mood	|	headachey again	]
[	music	|	Commodores - She's a Brick House	]

Well, this is the third night in a row I've had a headache. This is normally where I'd say "There has GOT to be something wrong with me," but I already know that, and I know what it is, too. I went to the doctor for my migraines a while back, and apparently, I have some sort of congenital issue where the muscles in my shoulders enjoy smashing some nerves which are linked to my temples. This results in horrible tension headaches right behind my eyes that can't be cured with normal painkillers, and sometimes lead to migraines. They also make me want to cry. No, not because of the pain; I have no clue why, exactly. It probably has something to do with those crazy chemicals in my head. Imitrex, my migraine meds, can get rid of the headaches... but they also make me feel really weird, so I don't like taking them unless it just gets so horrible that I have to. After I take Imitrex, my neck feels really heated and strange... like I've just run a mile, and all the blood is rushing to my head. It also makes me feel kinda weak. My blood pressure is low too, by the way. The doctor doesn't think that has much to do with anything, but I sure do feel shitty lately, and from what I've read about low blood pressure, the symptoms match. Self-diagnosis is rarely ever right, though. I'm probably just sleep deprived or something.
Sometimes, when I get really horrific migraines, I find myself thinking of the lyrics to "Save Me" by Aimee Mann... "Why don’t you save me?"
But then I remember that I don't believe in a sentient, interventionist god, and I just take my Imitrex and go to sleep.

If anyone wants to trade in their body, I'd be happy to consider it. I'm not looking for anything fancy, just so long as it runs properly. Considering the headache problems, I'm not sure how much this old heap is worth... but surely I could trade it to a desperate transsexual and get a nice sturdy male model in return? Any takers?

[	mood	|	headachey	]
[	music	|	Placebo - Every Me and Every You	]

The title of this post happens to be lyrics to the song I'm listening to, so don't worry, I'm not getting married. I just like that phrase for some reason.

I'm dropping my Philosophy of Love and Sex class. As it turns out, it's an extremely boring class for me. I'm already familiar with all the material we're covering because... you know... I think. Two of the main things we're covering are De Sade and Lolita; I'm more familiar with De Sade than is healthy (I've read most of 120 Days of Sodom,) and since I've actually read Lolita, which we don't plan to do in class, I'm way ahead with that one, too. It's no fun to go to class which is supposed to promote thought, only to find that they're discussing things you've milled over 13810923821 times before. In addition, we have fairly lengthy reading assignments, which cut huge chunks out of the study time I need for other classes. Then, of course, there's the timing. I have a 2 hour gap between Philosophy and the class before it, and I really hate figuring out how to waste that much time... I also hate having to go back up to the college if I decide to go home and take a nap. It's just not worth it. I only have 13 hours now, but considering the classes, that's still a pretty heavy load. Statistics, Botany + Botany Lab, Evolution, and General Psychology.

It appears I no longer have a fun elective class to look forward to, doesn't it? Actually, though, I'm loving Evolution. That's probably a good guage of how big of a nerd I really am. So far it has been the single most interesting class I've ever taken in my life. It makes me feel smart, too, because I'm one of the few people in that class who hasn't yet taken Genetics but had the balls to stay, and I'm probably the only freshman. Inspite of that, I understand the class with ease. I guess that means I spend way, way too much time researching genetics on my own. It also probably means that I've chosen the right major and future profession.

In other news, I got a tooth drilled today. One of my really, really old fillings fell out while I was brushing my teeth, and as it turns out, it fell out because it had "sprung a leak" and there was a tiny bit of decay under it. That was probably the first filling I ever got on an adult tooth. Ironically, it was on one of my molars... which mom payed a lot of money to have sealant put on when I was young. If any of you reading this ever become parents and your child's dentist recommends putting sealant on your child's teeth, punch them in the face. Seriously. I remember being a kid and sitting in that dentists's chair for well over an hour while he coated each of my molars in the foulest substance I have ever had the misfortune to have in my mouth (and I've accidentally eaten a stink bug before, so that's saying something.) It's not that the stuff tastes bad, it's that it fucking tastes and smells like gasoline mixed with rubber cement and pure ammonia. You have to sit there with a mouthful of toxic waste, waiting for it to dry while it sets your eyeballs on fire and eats away the lining of your nasal cavity. I think I probably cried the entire time, since I was about 7 years old. I've had my fair share of tooth drilling, and I promise you; this was far, far worse. Haha, and if that wasn't enough, one of the sealants cracked within a year and I had to get my tooth drilled anyway! Thanks go to my childhood dentist for putting me through this ultimately useless semi-traumatic experience (he recommended the procedure to my mom.)
The moral of the story is: If it ain't broke, don't fix it.